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Why Your Bucket List Should Only Include Propagating Moss
Life is short. Moss is forever, I think?
Life is short. It’s important to have a clear-eyed view of what you want to accomplish before you die, and in my view that list should start and end with propagating some sweet fucking moss.
Sure, you could spend your final years making amends with those you’ve wronged or trying to grow spiritually. You could travel the world or learn another language. You could also get your hands dirty in the moss propagation game and see where that takes you. Besides — what else is worth propagating? Christmas Trees? Snake plants?
Give me a break. I’m a moss guy, all the way.
When you die and meet your maker, do you really want to say “in all my time on this beautiful Earth, I never propagated so much as an square inch of Silky Forklet, Swan’s-Neck Thyme or Glittering Wood moss?” You’d get laughed out of heaven.
And then you’d go to hell.
Not so good, being in hell. Not a lot of moss. Hell is famously difficult for plant life. It’s too hot, for one, and the billions of bad people stomping (and marching) around would disturb the growth cycle of even the hardiest sheet moss.
Are there any plants in hell? I get this question all the time. The answer: there are likely a…
