Trump Has A Path To Victory, And I Have A Path To Seeing My Daughters Again

(Jake Smith has written for The National Review, The Federalist and a cancelled Ben Shapiro pilot where Shapiro plays a cop who investigates crimes below eye level.)

(WASHINGTON) There’s been so much blather and bluster from the Fake News media about “President-elect Biden” and “Vice President-elect Harris.”

Take it from me, neither will be sworn into office. Why? Well, the election was a fraud, much like my ex wife who left merely because I was “terrible to talk to” and “incapable of insight.”

Save me the hysterics about the Electoral College and its “certifications”. The path forward for the President is as clear as the subpoena some punk kid brought to my bitcoin meetup.

Trump must:

1. audit the Georgia vote, regardless of what local officials “declare”
2. purge thousands of illegal votes in Wisconsin and Michigan
3. s̶t̶a̶y̶ ̶a̶ ̶h̶u̶n̶d̶r̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶t̶ ̶a̶w̶a̶y̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶K̶a̶r̶e̶n̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶
4. flip Pennsylvania’s electors by suing the legislature

Now it’s important to note that the fight ahead will not be easy. Patriots who care about the truth must hold the line. That means refusing to acknowledge Biden’s “presidency” with family and ex-best friends (Mike), supporting the #MAGA movement on Twitter/Parler and shredding all receipts from the first five years of my so-called marriage to the so-called love of my so-called life.

Also, bitcoin.

If you believe that a shady career politician like Joe Biden got over eighty million votes, I’ve got a 2013 Dodge Dart to sell to you. In fact, even if you don’t believe that, I’m still taking offers over on my personal page. Whatever sentimental value it held is long gone.

The fake election results — what fake news media wants us to see.

What we could see if Karen comes to her senses and lets me see my frickin’ kids.

Mr. President — you have a clear path forward to be certified the legal winner of the 2020 election, and I certainly have a clear path forward to seeing my kids again. We need your leadership in this country, just like Dana and the other one need their father.

2013 Dodge Dart