Biden Campaign Plans $300 Million John McCain Fireworks Display To Unite Country

A leaked planning document for Election Night.

A leaked document has revealed the Biden campaign’s plan for election night, should things go their way: a $300 million fireworks display depicting the grinning face of the late Senator John McCain.

With 23 days until the election, the Biden campaign is pivoting to its closing argument. And it isn’t particularly subtle.

“I may be a Democrat, but I’ll be an American president,” says the former Vice President, in digital ads and television spots. He’s said the phrase on the campaign trail too, at recent events in Iowa and Pennsylvania.

Gone are the appeals to Sanders and Warren supporters. Endorsements from prominent Republicans like John Kasich, Cindy McCain and Jeff Flake are being touted as the Biden campaign senses — even if they won’t admit it publicly — victory over the Republican nominee, President Donald J. Trump.

The election night fireworks display, a nod of respect to the late conservative John McCain, is “an ode to the post-partisanship a Biden administration will usher in,” says a senior campaign advisor, given anonymity to discuss internal deliberations. “It’ll really emphasize that we are one nation, one America, and that while we ran a progressive campaign we are prepared to govern as business-friendly Republicans from 2008.”

Another source, reached via email, says “we are pro-fracking and against Medicare for All. It’s a big tent party.”

Another idea being tossed around inside the campaign, sources say, is a “Day One” bill whereby a prominent Republican, such as retiring Senator Patrick Toomey of Pennsylvania, will join the Democratic Party. The catch? “He’ll become a Democrat and Democratic Senator Joe Manchin will become a Republican,” says an internal document proposing the idea. “This will further show our serios [sic] intention to govern from the center (of the Republican party).”

The Manchin-Toomey party swap would also lower workforce protections for children.



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Max Barth

comedian, writer (Reductress, The Hard Times, Hard Drive, Slackjaw, Points In Case), Libra moon. All my stuff: