A Sleep Paralysis Shadow Demon Folded My Laundry

I could see it. A dark shape, more of a shadow really, was floating a few feet from my bed. My eyes felt half-closed, I can’t say now whether they were. My breath became shallow.

I felt the shadow creep closer, and somehow managed to will my eyes closed.

I’ve suffered from sleep paralysis for a decade, and fellow sufferers know that with the “paralysis” effect often comes the sense that something else is in the room. This can be an upsetting experience.

My eyes opened again. Or had I never closed them? Time stretched. My body felt far away. I pictured myself hurriedly pressing buttons in a kind of mental control room, to no effect.

I saw it again out of the corner of my eye. It was longer than before and humanoid. It seemed to glide along the wall until it reached the pile of laundry I’d meant to put away. How embarrassing!

A silent scream left my lips.

The shadow began to fold my laundry, starting with the underwear I basically never wear anymore. I really should get rid of that.

Moonlight draped the foot of my bed. I drifted between dream and nightmare. Sleep paralysis attacks generally last from one to two minutes, but can feel like hours. I dozed off and woke up in the same frozen state.

An extension cord ran over my legs. The shadow demon was ironing my jeans.

Who irons jeans? I shivered. A demon from hell, that’s who. I put all my effort into moving one arm, one hand, one finger. Nothing twitched.

I heard a hiss. The dark and otherworldly figure was now steam cleaning my dress shirts. I don’t even own a steam cleaner. How thoughtful! It must have brought one. A single tear rolled down my cheek. This would save me serious time in the morning.

I attempted to smile and fell asleep.